Spank your kid and she might not go to Harvard

A recently published study states that kids who are spanked have lower IQs – regardless of the geographic location. This should pretty much put an end to any and all spanking in Marin, as just the mere thought that our kids could have a lower IQ than other kids is enough to enter intense therapy for many parents in the area. “If I don’t spank little Jenny, she may be able to skip the third, fourth and fifth grades and potentially head straight to medical school.”  (Though, admittedly, I don’t actually know of any parents that still spank their kids).

Personally, the thought of spanking K-Man has never entered my mind. It’s never been logical to me: If kid acts up, solve the problem by wailing on his ass. Seems to me that it doesn’t do much other than send a message to the kid: In the future if anyone in my life acts up, I should hit that person. Repeatedly.

Thanks to a bit of time spent on the couch, myself, I’ve truly come to understand the importance of our experiences as kids. The way we respond and react to certain situations get hard-wired in our systems when we’re wee little ones. I’m pretty sure that if a kid learns that hitting is the way to solve problems…well, you do the math. It’s not that hard to figure out. But, parents often need tangible facts and figures they can lean on. And, hitting your kid stupid may be all they need to end the silly practice of spanking for perceived bad behavior.

Kids around the world, especially the ones who haven’t had their IQs permanently altered via the hand or paddle, are rejoicing. “Look, Dad! If you stop spanking me, I’ll be smart one day! I’ll be able to talk all pretty and stuff.”

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